I will restore balance to the force. One day.
On May 30th, I am going to present the sum of my learning from the last 5 months.
I would like to offer one word which I think sums up the situation quite nicely:
PAAAAAAANNNNNNIIIIIICCCC WE’RE ALL GOING TO DIIIIIIIIIIIIIIE.
All right, that was six words. I got a bit excited. Still though: I don’t feel ready. About as ready as I did in my last post, actually.
It’s just-I don’t feel ready to go out and say ‘this is the sum of 5 months of work.’ Intellectually, I know I’ve come a long way from where I started out. I sort of kind of know what I’m doing, as opposed to sort of kind of maybe know what I’m doing. I can deflect a punch without tensing up, I can usually take down an attacker (usually….), the basic techniques are starting to come subconsciously. Sometimes I think I even understand why things are working, and that’s super exciting.
Also intellectually, I’m aware that I’m still a n00by n00b, and I’m not sure I can fool anyone into not being able to tell.
You know that moment, when you decide to skip an assignment because you think the teacher isn’t going to check? And then you find out you have to hand it in, and you have nothing?
Yeah, I feel like that. It’s not like I didn’t do anything; I’ve worked on yeung chuan. But what if I was just so bad to begin with, after 5 months I’ve only just gotten to where I should have started? What if I present my learning, and people go ‘wow, what has she been doing for the last 5 months?”.
Sadly, I don’t really get a choice. So. My presentation is going to be a station-thing. I’ll put a few mats out, and show people how to runs some basic drills. There will probably be a very basic, not-all-that-pretty poster board to explain a bit of history and a few of the techniques. My sister will be there, so I can either demonstrate some take-downs/throws on her (sorry Katie) or just on random willing passersby.
TRANSLATION: Hide on corner. Hope no one comes by. Try not to hyperventilate. WOOT.
It’s weird to think of it as the end of in-depth, because it’s not really. I won’t have to write blog posts, or worry about poster boards, but the rest is kinda going to stay the same. I’ve described yeung chuan as my warm glow of happiness. I love it. I plan on practicing (and hopefully improving) for ever and ever and ever. AND EVER.
If I was a cheesier person, I would make some comment about how ‘my journey has just begun, duh duh duuuuh’. I’m not, though, or at least I like to think I’m not, so instead:
I’m neither a ninja nor a jedi. Yet. But my time will come, and it will be beautiful, and lit up with the multie-hued glow of lightsabres.
